Why we won’t watch The Mentalist

tmJerk and I were looking over last week’s ratings and were surprised to see The Mentalist in the 8th spot with 16.5 million viewers. This could have something to do with it’s Tuesday @ 9 time slot that competes with well, nothing. Either way, this is a show that we don’t watch. Gasp! shock! horror! It’s okay, we’re still going to tell you all about it, all about why we won’t watch it that is.

Right off the bat, ‘The Mentalist’ is a terrible name for a show. It doesn’t tell you what it’s about, it doesn’t bring forth any sort of information that would make me want to sit down and waste an hour of my day that I could be trolling message broads. If you don’t have a good name, you have to put forth some good buzz or a good image. If there was good buzz it got right past me. I’ve heard talk about the show but nothing more than mentioning it exists. Any press is good press?

frankenfail2The biggest problem with the show is their lead actor. You may know him from such things as “Sex and Death 101” or “Naked: Stories of Men” Nope?  me either.  He has a severe case of FrankenFace. He appears as if someone took parts of multiple attractive people and smushed them into one but somewhere in that process something went wrong. The needle slipped, the hydro went out, something happened and he doesn’t look right.
We’ve taken the liberty of putting together a map of his face for you. He starts with Neil Patrick Harris’ forhead featuring hair from John Schnider. Add Alec Baldwin’s eyes, Tom Welling’s nose and impecable cheekbones all squished together by Brad Pitt’s mouth and flawless jaw.

Now, maybe if they started advertising the show as ‘the crime drama with the guy with five people’s faces’ I might tune in.  Hell, they should just rename it that.  Can 16.5 million people be wrong?  The answer is yes.  The highest ratings of the week still went to 60 minutes by 5.8 million viewers. [raitings] I bet they didn’t even have a guy with five faces on it.


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~ by doublebitch on December 3, 2008.

5 Responses to “Why we won’t watch The Mentalist”

  1. When I hear ‘The Mentalist,’ I think ‘now there’s a show about a retarded magician.’ Possibly one who solves crimes, but that aspect isn’t necessary.

  2. Simon Baker does have a bland face. He was in The Devil Wears Prada but I did not recognize him at all at the time (and I watched that movie several times). I also saw Sex and Death 101 (big waste of time) and was not a big fan of his acting. I like Robin Tunney but Baker cancels it out.

  3. She was the only reason I even looked at this show. I’ve loved some of her work too and I’m sure she’s great in this but there’s not enough to make me want to check it out.

  4. Baker was the crazy surfer assassin in Smith- loved him sparring with Amy Smart in that one along with Ray Liotta. The Mentalist is doing well because it has some fresh faces and is not another hair and fiber is the answer to everything crime show….and nothing else is on 🙂

  5. hey! I was just trying to look up how to contact you.

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